the anonymous senator

not so anonymous, really 
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August 2, 2008

seen and heard

Things seen and heard on a six mile night run that was probably inevitable after seeing that Dean Karnazes documentary on Thursday:
1. bats
2. frogs
3. crickets. lots of crickets.
4. cormorants in their favorite tree
5. two deer
6. eight deer
7. two more deer
8. and another deer

Things felt:
1. thirst
2. nausea
3. a tight right hip

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August 2, 2008

yeah, blog thoughts. meta.

After some initial enthusiasm, I'm having trouble figuring out what to do with my public blog (b1lt0npw-dot-blogsp0t). Part of the problem is that I also have this quasi-private posterous.  When I'm inspired to write it's usually my private thoughts, opinions and self-doubts that aren't relevant or appropriate for the public blog.  Also, I'm stuck thinking about the public site as representing me professionally and personally since it's the site I put on my personal business card and web profiles. I'm so busy with work (which is off-limits for blogging; there's enough drama there as it is and I like to stay floating above it wearing my uber-professional facade as armor), the Red Hook project, family, and everything else that I don't have the time to put into it - I don't need another project. I don't want to let it stagnate, but at the same time I don't want to put up crap just for the sake of updating.

There's an interesting debate going on in the pro-blogging community (a group I emphatically do not want to join, yet wouldn't mind learning from) about how personal to make your blog. Some people says you should keep it personal and opinionated because that is more compelling and better represents you as a whole person, while others say you should focus strictly on what is relevant and useful for your target audience. Many walk that line. Many fall off.

There are other possibilities:
1. I like sharing, but I don't like writing.
2. I don't actually have anything interesting or original to say.

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July 29, 2008

simplicity

I say I want simplicity, but I just don't have the balls. I laugh at Real Simple magazine and the Container Store for selling complexity and consumption through the IDEA of simplicity, the same way I laugh at the way that companies relentlessly sell the idea of being able to buy your way to sustainability. As if it was possible to subtract by adding, get leaner by gorging yourself.

Yet on the web I use half a dozen services that do the same thing, always trying out the shiny new thing, believing that it will be better, faster, more intuitive, SIMPLER. Believing the hype. Thus, I've got my crap spread across half the web. Recently I thought about what would be left if I really tried to remove all trace of myself from the web. Mostly race results, home addresses and message board postings would remain.

Trying out new ways to organize and communicate, online and off, is a cop-out, a way to procrastinate by focusing on process rather than actually doing anything. The holy grail of the perfect process. It's ironic because it's fundamental to my profession as an urban planner to understand that decision making, design, and development is an inherently messy process. A plan created using a strictly rational model is a lie because you can never have perfect information, and the goals are likely vague or even conflicting.  Yet I can't seem to accept that this complexity applies to myself as well. Spend too much time trying to create order out of chaos and you only create confusion - and don't achieve what you want to do.  Perhaps I just don't want to face the reality of what I do and don't want to do, because it doesn't agree with what I SAY I want. Hm, a psychiatrist would be proud.

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July 27, 2008

coming out in the wash

I kinda like this image of a metrocard stuck to theinside of the washing machine. I feel like there's a story in there somewhere.

I've gotten two ANTIFAIL submissions from strangers, which is cool. I'm finding myself attracted to more radical ideas and images of people who made a difference, which is different than the original theme of success and beauty. I guess the idea of having a soapbox is going to my head, even if it is a very small soapbox. We'll see where it goes.

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July 25, 2008

presence

"People have been so paranoid about having any presence online for such a long time," says David Karp, founder of the Tumblr blogging service and a friend of Allison's. "A lot of them have gone through that transition of 'Well, shit, it's out there. I'm searchable on Flickr or Google.' The cat is out of the bag, and the only way to take back that control is to get out there and have a presence, have an identity that you feel represents you."

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July 25, 2008

my headache is SO big


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July 24, 2008

i can haz ANTIFAIL?

Last month I read this post by social media Jedi Gwen Bell where she comments on the internet FAIL meme (see the FAIL Blog).  I immediately thought it would be cool if someone created a website/meme as a counterpoint to FAIL. I thought it should be called ANTIFAIL, not NOFAIL or UNFAIL, because it should represent more than the absence of failure – but rather the opposite of failure.

Last night when I was making dinner it occurred to me how easy it would be to create an ANTIFAIL website.  After the family went to bed I opened up the moleskine and wrote the first post. Then I created antifailblog.org.  Even though I described it as "a collection of community-submitted images that represent ANTIFAIL - people, places, and events that are incredibly, and perhaps unexpectedly, awesome," my main desire is to make a personal statement about success, inspiration, beauty and happiness.  That message is not complex:

Don't be afraid to spread a positive message, and never apologize for wanting to make people's lives better. We're all in this together.

Never hokier, but never truer.

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July 23, 2008

no

I guess this should come as no surprise, but I've decided not to race nationals.  I didn't want to say no right away because opportunities like this don't fall into your lap every day (although years ago I did accidentally qualify for the Powerman Zofingen duathlon in Switzerland - I didn't go to that, either).  I can't justify leaving home for four days and spending close to $1,000 in entry fees and travel to get my ass beat in a race that I don't have time to train for. One thing at a time.

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July 21, 2008

well, that was unexpected

Fate is playing a joke on me because I told H I couldn't do the shag
24 hour race in September. In explanation - all the other teams have
either already qualified through other races or have declined to go to
Georgia.


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: USARA
Date: Mon, Jul 21, 2008 at 1:03 PM
Subject: USARA Nationals Invitation
To:xxxxxxxxxx


Nationals Team Invitation

Invitation email

2008 GoLite USARA Adventure Race National Championship

Congratulations on your team's recent success at the USARA adventure
race national qualifier in which you competed. As one of the top
teams in the nation your team has qualified to attend the 2008 GoLite
USARA Adventure Race National Championship to be held in Blue Ridge,
Georgia. On the weekend of November 7-9 you can go head to head with
other nationally ranked teams in the country for a chance to be
crowned the 2008 GoLite USARA Adventure Race National Champions. The
weekend promises to be a spectacular event set in the challenging
terrain of blindingly beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains.

You must notify & mail the registration form to the USARA within 14
days receipt of this message if you plan to attend the 2008 GoLite
USARA Adventure Race National Championships. If your team is declining
the invitation please RSVP via email to confirm that you received the
initial invitation. The USARA can be contacted by telephone at
xxx-xxx-xxxx or email at xxxxxxxxxxxx.

If you do not respond within 14 days, your slot will roll down to the
next finishing team. For more information, go to the 2008 GoLite USARA
Adventure Race National Championships website at
www.usaranationals.com. Attached is the entry form for the 2008
GoLite USARA Adventure Race National Championship. You must print it
out and mail it back to the USARA if you plan on attending.


Qualifying Race: The Longest Day


Good Luck!


USARA Staff

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July 20, 2008

skine

Today I went all the way to Princeton to get a Melitta one-cup coffee filter cone, because that's the closest town with a kitchen store. I dropped my french press in the sink last week, and decided to get a filtered coffeemaker to replace it because I was getting sick of the mud. In my weekend travels I went to a few houseware chain stores and department stores that don't carry the lowly Melitta, I imagine because they don't want people to figure out that it makes better coffee than their automatic drip coffee makers. While there I admired a Chemex, and I might buy it for entertaining, but it's too much of a pain for the daily cup. 

While I was there I took advantage of the wide selection of snobby stores to buy a moleskine squared notebook, the small size, for Red H00k. Mmm, graph papery. So now I am a snob in both coffee and notebooks. And I am a little less concerned about managing the project, now that I have a place for my notes that doesn't depend on the internet, and now that I don't have to stare at an lcd screen just to review my notes.

After shopping I joined K and the boys at the Cotsen Children's Library in Prinecton's Firestone Library, which has lots of whimsical nooks to read in, like a tree, wishing well, comfy chairs, etc. I would love to show you some photos but picture taking is prohibited, as the grouchy guard reminded me.

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